Do you have a minute?

This has been one of the most emotional days that I have had in a while. I was sick yesterday and I didn't go to work. Many of you know about the uncertainty that I have been experiencing with the company that I work for. So I walk in the door at work this morning and go to my desk. I log on to my computer and then wait. About that time, my boss calls me in his office. We start off by talking about me being sick yesterday, it then proceeds to the latest news about our company. We have just been bought.....again. Let me just say that this has been one of the most stressful things in my life for the past year and a half. I am almost numb because of all the drama surrounding our company. Nothing prepared me for the next major event of the day. One of the guys I work for came in the office and visited with my boss behind closed doors (which hasn't been anything out of the ordinary with everything else that has gone on). When he comes out he asks me if I have a minute to visit. When I walked into his office I notice that some of his furniture is gone and his pictures are off the wall. I can't believe what is about to happen. He tells me that he has just resigned. WHAT???? This is a person who I have grown to really respect and admire. We have truly become great friends. We have talked about our spiritual lives as well as family lives. We have made a connection after almost 11 years of working together. As he is telling me everything, I just break down when I tell him I truly appreciate the fact that we have grown so much closer. I talked about how it was hard at first, but we have grown close. He told me that it was the Holy Spirit moving through us and fostering our friendship. He has really made me think about things in my spiritual life and I felt like I could go to him with anything. He has given us so many things for my nephews when we needed it the most. He has listened to me complain about work. He has listened to me share stories of my kids and I have enjoyed listening to him talk about his kids. We have come a long way as friends. I cried off and on all day. I realize that God puts people in our lives for a reason and my friend filled his purpose and now is gone. I know we will stay in touch, but it will be on such a different level. Thank you for becoming such a good friend. I will miss you terribly. Who's gonna keep me on my toes and make me laugh? I will be calling you. You aren't getting rid of my okay. Love ya friend.

Pictures Finally!!!!

So I finally decided to add some pictures to my blog. Here are pictures of the boys. Now I guess I'll have to dig the camera out and start taking more pictures.

Brayden

I wanted this entire post to be about Brayden. Brayden is my sweet middle child. He is the most loving, caring, and helpful child that I know. He tries so hard to do what is right even though it doesn't alrways turn out that way. Brayden was diagnosed with ADHD and Disruptive Behavior Disorder. We had Brayden's ARD meeting at school this last week. He is no longer part of the 504 program. Yeah Brayden. Academically Brayden is on track with everything. Of course he's not at the top of the scale nor is he at the bottom. He's right where he fits...in the middle. Brayden always finds himself in the middle. He's always in the middle of other people's business, he's always in the middle of fights, and he's always in the middle of hard work. God absolutely knew where to put Brayden in our family...in the middle. Brayden is known for ear hustling (as his Daddy would say). Brayden has been so proud of himself for memorizing the name of the cysts that he will have removed from his throat/neck in December. I have a hard time remembering the names. (Thyroglossal duct cyst, brachial cleft cyst) Whew those are some long names. I'm so proud of the person that Brayden is becoming. I love him dearly and hope that as a parent I don't over look my middle child. I love you Bray!!!

Thank you Father!

I just want to give praise to my Heavenly Father today for teaching me a valuable lesson. He taught me today that I needed to place ALL of my trust in Him and Him alone. He taught me that when He tells me to do something that He means it. He taught me that He loves me and will provide for my every need and not my wants. He taught me to have faith. He taught me that he can wipe my slate clean and give me a fresh start and then it's my choice on how I proceed. Thank you Father God. I will do my best to make you proud. You gave me no other choice than to look to you and I am thankful for that. I forget so many times that you are in control and I'm not. I need those reminders. Praise You!

Seeking Guidance From Above

Well, so much has happened over the past week or two. I haven't had time to sit down and post anything so I decided that I would do it right now while I had a minute.

1. Shena, Jaelun, and Jorden have arrived back at our house. We got a call at 3:00 am (that's right 3:00 am) on Monday. It was Shena. She had run out of gas on the far side of Bushland near the rest stop. So I wake Quentin up and off we go. We got them filled up with gas and back home we went. So you might ask what guidance we need.....

A. We need guidance from above on how to handle this situation in the most loving and caring way that we can. We love Shena and the boys and want nothing more than to see them taken care of.

B. Financially we are not in the position to support them right now. Shena has had an interview and hopefully will start working next week.

C. We need to heal this relationship. We need to mend the trust issues and the hurt feelings in this relationship. We love each other dearly and want nothing more than to become the sisters to each other that we've always wanted.

2. My second issue that I am seeking guidance for is my role at church.

A. Keri called me to ask if I wanted to teach upstairs. UPSTAIRS????? I have wanted to do this, but was really intimidated by the thought of actually teaching kids who might actually ask me a question. Well this is my opportunity to step out of my comfort zone and dive in. I have to say that I'm really excited and I can't wait to see what God has in store for me. I know that this will be a huge blessing to me. I'm scared to death!!!!

B. I have felt very led to pursue some type of volunteer activity out in the community. I want to go out and share the love I feel from God with other people. I am searching for the perfect opportunity to do this. I have had several suggestions and thoughts. I know that God will provide me with the perfect answer. This is also out of my comfort zone.

3. My next issue is my job. I love my clients, and the people I work with directly. It's everything else that I am struggling with. I have been here almost 11 years and I just don't know what to think about things now. Of course we are going through a merger, and it's emotionally draining. There are days that I don't even want to get out of bed. This is not like me at all. I have felt that God was leading me away from my job for a while now. What to do, what to do?

4. My last issue is with Brayden. He will be having surgery in December. He has a thyroglossal duct cyst and a brachial cleft cyst. He will be having them removed along with his tonsils. This is great in the fact that when he gets sick, he will no longer get the huge knot on his neck. However, he is my baby and I'm scared. I just want to make sure this is the right thing to do. The other good note on this is that there is a CHANCE that his ADHD will be better after removing his tonsils. Wouldn't that be a HUGE blessing??!!!

I pray for clarity and guidance. I pray for peace and comfort.

Frustration and a Prayer

Where do I even start??? My sister is driving me crazy. I really thought that this time she really wanted to turn her life around, start over, and really do something. As most of you know, my nephews came to live with us for a few weeks. My sister then came to get them. While she was here, we met with Randall. Randall prayed over her and really encouraged her to look to God for answers on whether or not she needed to be where she was at or if she needed to move back here. He prayed for clear signs. Well, within 24 hours we had already found her a job (it was a sure thing) and had worked it out that she would come stay with us for a while. So she decided to head back home on Tuesday with the intent of coming back here to live on Friday. Well, Friday comes and goes. No sister. Saturday comes and goes....No sister. Sunday comes and goes....No sister. Monday, she calls crying about how she is down to one diaper and just can't stay another night there. She really wants to come back here where she can get some help and be around family. So again, Quentin and I rush out send her the very last of the money we have in our checking account. We talk to her again and she says she would be leaving in a few hours to come back here. After talking with her we both decided that maybe it wouldn't be such a great idea for her to drive in the dark. She has just started some new meds that make her really tired. So she tells me to text her when I'm leaving my house on Tuesday to wake her up. So I did and she calls me right back. She says that she is going to get the boys ready and run to her storage unit and then leave town to head back here. Well several hours go by and no call. I sent her a text with my 800 number on it so that it wouldn't cost her or anyone else if she called me. Still nothing. She then calls me at 3:00 on Tuesday saying that she would be leaving in an hour and she would call before she left. Well guess what.....no call. Late last night I get a call saying she was going to leave at Midnight and would be here by 5:00 when I would be getting out of bed. She even said that she would just knock on our door to wake us when she got here so that we didn't have to leave the door unlocked. Well, I told her we would just leave it unlocked. All night I tossed and turned worried to death about her. At 5:00 I jumped up out of the bed, ran to the living room and nothing... I have sent her several text messages and still nothing. For some reason she can receive a text, but can't make calls from her phone. Frustration.... What do I do? I've prayed and prayed and asked for guidance on this whole situation. I know that I still need to give it over to God. I just don't get it. How can she just not show and just not call. Not only am I worried but so many of my friends are. Randall has called several times to see what was up and every time I just tell him, "I just don't know." Please pray for her. Pray for conviction on her heart. Pray for us to have understanding and show my sister the grace shown for us. We truely love her and want to help her. I would give anything to make sure she was taken care of and that she doesn't hurt.

Father God, we just adore you and thank you daily for the grace and compassion that you show us each day. We pray that Shena and the boys are okay and that you show her where you want her. We pray that you guide her and that she listens to you. We pray that you teach us to have the compassion that you have. We pray for understanding in this matter. Father God, thank you. Thank you for your love and mercy. In your son's precious name, Amen.

Sick Again

Well, I had to take Brayden to the doctor today. He has an area on his neck that will swell and it causes him a lot of pain. After going back through his medical records with the doctor today, we saw that he has been to the doctor for this issue 4 times over the past year. 3 of those times was within the past 6 months. Every time we go, we are told that it's a bacterial infection and they give him antibiotics. After the doctor saw the golf ball size knot on his throat today, he decided that it was time for us to see an ENT. Our doctor thought that it could be one of 3 things in his opinion. It could be an abcess, a cyst, or cancer. He said he really didn't think it was cancer due to the fact that we can treat it with antibiotics and it goes away. He felt that it could be either of the other 2. Needless to say we have to see the ENT on Friday. I've decided to take off the entire day so that I can just tend to Brayden and his needs. I think that he needs that special attention and his daddy is even going to take off part of the day. Keep us in your prayers. I'll keep everyone updated.